I knew that the time for me to be moved was soon when I noticed that the guard spoke about the Committee using words like “they”, rather than “we.” I asked him about it in the morning and he told me that he is not part of the committee anymore, he is merely my guard and my place in his house is only until such time as the Committee to find me a new location. It made me very sad, it was the end of an era for me and they not even told about it.
When it finally happened, the move was very fast. My former security guard sold his house more quickly than anyone imagined and the Committee had to get me out without much notice. I was taken away at a time when he was on my guard. I will miss him. He goes forward to his new life and I am stuck to my place. Maybe I have feelings for him, this seemed like such a natural arrangement, but this means moving forward for me too. The transition towards total imprisonment in a place where I do not have emotional ties with persons or places to is scary but also very fascinating. It is a part of what I’m looking for in my life.
My moving was very simple, I had my normal restraints, hands locked in front. I was dressed in a long skirt and short jacket, in addition I had a new and beautiful leather gloves. My guard, who I will no longer meet, brought them as a travel souvenir for me. I like the smell of new leather. I was led to the car which was parked near the door, maybe 5 meters from it. I had to climb up slightly because the floor is high (minivan), my place was on the right, next to sliding door. This is the easiest and safest place for me. Vehicle entry was a little difficult because my upper body is rigid due to the corset and rear chain.
As I sat in the car the seat belt was put on me, then my leg cuffs chain was locked under the seat. I was able to move my legs a little. Next, they put me in a supplementary loop belt which pulled my hips tightly to the bench, and my collar was locked to one of the back seats so that I need to sit very upright. The seat is not designed for use in a corset so it was a bit fraught. In addition, the lower part of the corset felt unpleasant because my feet were at a different angle than usual.
Finally, I got a wide belt that went around me and the seat. This was so I did not tilt while cornering or in the case of an accident. It was for my safety but it also caused unnecessary tension, like another corset. Since it was already evening and was almost dark I could sit normally and no one could see that I was locked in the seat. I liked the feeling that I was like a normal person, but secured tightly. The driving distance was not more than an hour, the greatest part of the trip was on the highway so there was not much to look at but still I enjoyed every minute of it.
Since the move happened very quickly, my new place was not completely finished. Therefore, I was transported to the room in the same house, I’m in this room as long as the modifications in the house are finished. The room is 5×4 m, a mattress on the floor and a table with my computer (and chair). My wallchain is attached to a corner so that I can move everywhere except the door. I think that this is a former clothing / dressing room. Its only window is a narrow window on top of the wall. I can go to toilet in the morning and in the evening when the renovation of the men have left. Then I can also take a shower. I have a bucket in the room here in case of emergency. Water I always have and also fruits, as well as small snacks, and I have food two times a day (I eat a little bit, but I try to eat several times).
I have been able to hear how the modifications going on in the house – the sounds of heavy machinery, hammering, sawing and welding. As there were sometimes foreign workers in the house I need to be quiet all day. The first two days I had a lockable ball gag, it was mostly a reminder and a lesson for me … I know how to be silent, even without it. I still do not know why things happened so fast but the Committee is of the opinion that the guard was too gentle for me. Perhaps it was due to our common past. In any case, it is time to get back in the right discipline and order, they said. I have not yet seen the new members of the Committee, but perhaps because of he/she things are more stringent … a new beginning.
Because of the work I have not had any exercise time – I’ve been inside all the time, but that is not necessarily a bad thing … the weather here is tedious. Tomorrow should be snowing, winter is coming. This transition is a little scary. I’m a little tense because I know that there are a lot of new things for me. Confused thoughts. I’ll admit that I am nervous, but at the same time I am a happy and satisfied. It satisfies me to hear the sounds of alterations in this house…. changes being made for me. It is a strange way of fine. I’m not afraid, I’m really proud of all this. Extradition is not an option, this is my life.
In my new prison many things will probably change – things will be more automatic and institutionalised. The idea is that the guard will not need to spend too much time on my routines. This is probably the last day in this room, I want to get out of here, but at the same time the tension is growing…